Stories by Mail, Day 39 – No pressure systems

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As it gleefully flung a cherry-colored Chevy trailblazer into the next town, watching the exhaust pipes snap and the doors collapse on themselves, Alberto snickered at the cameras.

It received excellent reception–every radio, television signal, and tweet within three hundred miles passed through its outflow–and so Alberto was well aware that most people believed it moved according to some pre-destined itinerary. Complete balderdash, the hurricane thought, tipping Roy Parker’s entire herd with a flick of an antsy feeder band. A surprised series of moos hurtled across the street as one of the bewildered Ayrshires found itself smashing through the roof of a mid-century Colonial.

Alberto intended to continue spinning westward, but its eye suddenly narrowed, and it hovered for a few seconds, focusing. It peered into Hannah Brewer’s office, where it saw a poster directly above her framed certificate (State Farm Employee of the Month, August 2016). “A Bad Day On Vacation Is Better Than A Good Day At Work!”, the text read in Day-Glo tones.

Not my work, cackled the hurricane, shifting course. It rammed through a subdivision, wondering to which zip code it should send Hannah’s poster.


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